With my one to one hypnotherapy and coaching clients in Manchester and on Skype, I’m virtually always focused on helping them to release pain and fear and to promote a sense of purpose within them.
What I find with a lot of people who are struggling with anxiety, PTSD, depression and other issues relating to their mental health is that the sense of emotional pain they feel is often greater than their sense of purpose.
Many people believe that life should be about the ‘pursuit of happiness’ and this is something that is constantly emphasised in the media. To me this is actually a limiting belief. It dis-empowers people in several ways:
- It makes you think or feel that happiness is something to be chased or pursued
- It makes you believe that if you’re not happy all the time, something must be wrong
- It makes people rely on outer circumstances for their happiness- eg. when you get the house, the partner, the right weather.
When people feel emotional pain and when they don’t feel the happiness that they think they’re supposed to feel, they often chase more, work harder and feel a need to prove themselves in some way to the outside world. This often ends up being a vicious circle and just makes life feel increasingly like one big battle and struggle.
People then often end up trying to cover up the pain through addictive behaviours such as drinking alcohol, eating to excess and taking drugs. It just gets brushed under the carpet further and further. Eventually though, it must come up to be released if the issues are to be resolved.
What I am often emphasising to my clients is that having a sense of purpose in your life is far more important than living a happy life. Yes we all like to be happy and having that sense of purpose will mean that you feel happy far more of the time. But emotions are meant to change and fluctuate, and with that strong foundation of purpose within you, you will be able to ride the waves of life’s challenges much more smoothly.
The most effective way to change your life is to identify any pain, stress or fear that has been holding you back. First of all you make a commitment to changing. Then you give yourself permission to release all that has been holding you back. You decide that you don’t have to be a victim of events of the past. You release emotional trauma, stress and you forgive yourself and others for anything in the past that is still affecting you. You release any limiting beliefs acquired in childhood and after.
In place of this old fear, pain stress and the limiting beliefs, you get clear on your unique strengths, qualities and values. What is it that makes you different? What qualities do you have that most other people don’t have? What do you feel gives you a sense of purpose or mission in your life?
This doesn’t have to be anything huge- it could be something as simple as bringing light to tough situations with your humour, or leading by example with the patience you show towards your children. It may be that you serve people with a smile in your job or that you bring a special quality to your team at work that enhances the work environment. The possibilities are endless.
If you’ve lost your way and don’t feel a sense of purpose, rest assured that you can rediscover that path. But if you’ve found yourself stuck in the mud for some time now- due to emotional pain related to stress, fear, anger or low self-esteem, you probably need to let yourself out first before you can find the path again.
I always recommend working with a therapist or coach for guidance on this- your results will be faster and you will feel better instantly. Many people who come to see me for hypnotherapy and coaching sessions feel a massive transformation in only one session. Working with a good hypnotherapist is a massively worthwhile investment, not only for you yourself but also for your family and for everyone that you come into contact with on a daily basis.
Release that pain. Release those limiting beliefs about yourself and about life. Learn to love yourself more. Grow that sense of purpose in your life. Feel the momentum as you begin to move forward freely through life.